Part Two of Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man

As I continue to read this book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man, I wish Steve Harvey came out with a copy 26 years ago so that my mother could have read it to me…. LOL…  It is a good book and I am taking notes ladies and gentlemen.

                                  

Part Two: Why Men Do What They Do was very informative because I don’t know why they do what they do.  Chapter Five, talks about why men wants to sleep with us ladies.  OK, from the headline I assumed Steve will explain who sex is so important to men but he goes to talk about how men get sex from women and how we women have the power to set our requirements up front if we don’t want to sleep with them right away.  He explains what is going through a man’s mind when he sees a beautiful woman and figuring out ways and how long it will take for him to have sex with her.  The bottom-line was that setting the standards in the beginning will get his mind thinking if I really like her and care about her I will wait until she is ready, the idea won’t go away but the urgency is not so much.  I liked that chapter because I never understand why men are willing to have sex so fast ad first before going to dinner, going to a movie, talking on the phone its like I don’t care just give me the panties and its just wrong.  It’s not fair either because while he is getting your panties he is getting someone else’s panties.

 

Chapter Six, addresses how men decide if a woman is a plaything or a keeper.  I raise my hand for being a keeper. Here comes those standards and requirements again ladies.  The plaything sets no standards and just goes along for the ride, the enjoyment the non-commitment.  I’m sure they don’t willingly do this but because they have not demanded more, they won’t get more.  Now, the one who sets standards and let the guy know up front what they are willing to do and not do then the man sees them as a keeper, the one who will include in life decisions and wait for.  Steve explains how men view sex as well.  It’s not all emotional for them as it is for us.  Also in the book reveals some suggestive statements and phrases women should practice saying if they want to be viewed a keeper and not a plaything and ladies its all in how we carry ourselves as well.  A man can tell a hoe from a housewife real fast.  Steve has a checklist to determine if you are a keeper or a plaything and the items are really good.

Here are a few:

1.    A woman who is loyal is a keeper; a woman who has her eye out for the next best thing is a throwback

2.    A woman who commands respect is a keeper; a woman who lets men get away with disrespecting her is a throwback.

3.    If he laughs off your requirements and standards, then he’s sport fishing; if he seems willing to abide by your rules, and actually follows through on them, then he’s looking for a keeper.

 

Chapter Seven addresses men who are mama’s boy.  I have never dated a mama’s boy but I have girlfriends who have and it drives them crazy.  On one hand it’s a good thing that your man has a good relationship with his mother and will do anything for her, but when he puts his wife and kids on the back burner for her and let’s her disrespect his lady then that is the problem.  Steve offers some helpful tips when dealing with mama’s boy.  He tells a good story about a woman who is tired of her mama’s boy.  Her husband jumps every time his mother wants something and she is left at home with the kids.  He tells this woman based off a Strawberry Letter 23 answer to tell him if he goes over there late again he better stay there.  To put some requirements on her husband and that is a good thing.  To make him realize what is most important.  That was good advice I thought but I can see how women would have a problem because nobody better talk about a man’s mother or make him choose that is a hard thing because he might choose his mother over his lady.

 

Chapter Eight, here is the Chapter that I was dying to read.  Steve is right about the fact that women will put up with a lot in all aspects, at work, at home with their man, but cheating is not one. If a man cheats he will be reminded everyday that he cheated and with whom like it was yesterday.  It will take some time for us to forgive them but I think women may stay with them.  So to answer the million-dollar question, why do men cheat, it is because they can.  There is always someone out there that will sleep with them regardless and when he does cheat him is not emotional attached to the situation meaning he can do it and be done with it or keep doing it and not having any feelings about it afterwards.  They lack of emotions make room for cheating to happen.  Men also think they can get away with it.  They try every slick trick in the book and they don’t think they will get caught because they don’t care.  He is cheating because he is still figuring out who he is and what he wants.  Now, this part was some bull because the guy can figure that out without me, so why be with me.  Men are always trying to be a man and be strong and reach some level and never satisfied, its like dude you re a good man chill out I’m with you so what’s the problem.  It’s not good enough for them.  Think about it when their boys find out they are cheating they don’t stop them they either encourage him or is jealous and that is a man’s playground to know his boys respect him as a man.  Of course, Steve put some blame on us women saying that some of us don’t keep it sexy don’t do the things we use to do but kids, jobs, bills and other crazy stuff often times does get in the way.  My male told me one day that his girl just stopped having sex with him, cut the sex off right away and they live together.  He was moody around people, stayed out at clubs more and ended up cheating and in that case I don’t understand why she did that and it could have been her fault but he could have made her explain why she did that and if she needed space that would have been more acceptable.  And of course since the pool men of for women is slim to none there is going to be a woman out there who doesn’t care about what’s at home and still want to sleep with the taken ones because the taken ones don’t beg, and they give that space women always asking for.

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One response to this post.

  1. Posted by Robyn on April 8, 2009 at 2:27 pm

    It has been too long since I have posted on here, so here is my take on part two…
    The part about mamma’s boys, I totally agree with. I was feeling Steve when he told the lady that part of the reason that her hubby jumped for his mom was her own fault. If in the beginning of the relationship I see you are constantly changing plans with me to go do something for your mother, then I am going to tell you to go be with her then. I don’t have any issues with a man that is close to his mom and does things for her, but when we are married with children and you leave me in the bed to go bake cookies with mom, I have major issues.

    The part about cheating. . .I already knew that. I won’t blame all of it on women, but a lot of guys cheat b/c they can and they know the woman isn’t going to leave them. They know a few nights on the couch and maybe a little turquois box from Tiffany’s (wink-wink), will fix everything. Yeah he might have to hear about it for a few months, but eventually she will get over it. NOT ME!!!!! I will take the turquois box and roll the hell out. In other instances, it is the woman’s fault b/c you can’t go from giving up action 5 days a week to just cutting it off completely and not expecting him to go get it somewhere else. Now if you are pregnant or sick, then that is understanable, but come on. . . .do you really have a headace for a month every single night? Some might feel that if he loves you then he will wait. That is crap!!! At the end of the day he is a man and his make up doesn’t allow for him to go without for too long.

    I am still not finished the book, but I am on the chapter called How to Get the Ring. I must be honest and say I skipped the chapter about kids seeing as how I don’t have any. I thought it would be pointless to read it, plus I was sleepy!! If I ever get in a situation where I need to introduce my child (don’t plan on more than one) to a guy, I will go back and read it. Hopefully I will be able to post about the last chapter tomorrow or Friday.

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